Homage

I had planned for this trip to Bangalore to be different from the usual trips that I make. For one thing I knew it would be different as I was travelling alone and hence there would be no compulsions both from Kumar and Sridevi to do the usual rounds. Also I had made sure that no one except the people in the two houses I proposed to spend time knew of the trip. Since I know a lot of people in Bangalore, the social pressures are too much and thus end up spending more time on the road enroute to visiting people. As most of you are aware the traffic in Bangalore is chaotic and not being up to date on the latest traffic regulations can make any journey a nightmare. The only planned engagement was the betrothal ceremony of my friend’s son – the reason for the trip. However the trip turned out to be one of those where one goes down a not so pleasant memory lane. It evoked a chapter lying superficially hidden in a corner of the grey matter.
I would like to go back to the year 1996, when my only sister in law was admitted to the Air Force Command Hospital in Bangalore. She was diagnosed with a lump in her breast and the biopsy had shown that it was malignant. Hence the only option was a mastectomy and thus the admission. Her husband was a retired Colonel and they lived in Hosur, Tamil Nadu. Since Bangalore was just an hour’s drive from Hosur, it seemed the most natural thing to admit her at the Command Hospital. I reached Bangalore a day after her surgery and got to spend the days with her. She being a very lively person with a very positive attitude, we would chat and while away the time. She had known of the malignancy and of the unexploded bomb that she was carrying. But somehow she never made a mention of it and she carried on with her sweet disposition. As for me, I put up a brave front but at the same time was appalled and upset at the conditions that prevailed in the Command Hospital, which was considered as the top medical facility in South India for the army personnel. Stray dogs would roam around the campus and the toilets were in shambles. The nursing staff were so discourteous and the doctors were just not reachable. My sister in law endured the treatment meted out to her with tenacity. I did not hear her complain even once. Well that was how she was. I have always appreciated her good heartedness, but this I thought was stretching it a bit too far. She came out of the hospital scathed but cheerful. Things continued to be fine for the next eight months after which she again fell ill. This time it was with severe head aches something she just could not take in her stride. I must credit her her sagacity because her threshold of pain was far higher than the normal Indian woman’s. Thus she was brought back to the Command hospital for further tests and treatment.
The diagnosis was not what one would want to hear and as for the prognosis we knew would be in the negative. She was asked to take the usual MRI scan to get the internal picture. The result of the scans was not at all good and all of us were stunned by what we heard. In 1997 when the CAT and MRI scans were normal investigative tools, it was shocking to know that the Command Hospital did not have the required machines. Each of these procedures had to be done at a scan centre outside the hospital premises. Thus after a couple of visits, she was asked to start on chemotherapy. She would get herself admitted for a day and get the medicine into her body. Her conditioned turned from bad to worse and finally she reached a stage when it was thought that she needed to have radiation as well. Radiation treatment was not available at Command Hospital and thus had to commute between Command Hospital and KIDWAI Memorial Institute of Oncology. I was really upset to see her being taken to the KIdwai centre in one of the huge Military trucks. It was the most insensitive happening. The family could not stand this demeaning act and thus from day 2 arrangements were made for a car to pick her up and bring her to the KIDWAI centre. This routine was short lived as her condition seemed to take such steep turns that every day brought her condition down by more than 10%. Thus she had to be shifted to KIDWAI Centre were luckily a room was available. In less than two weeks time she became a person who could not see or take any food orally and who had lost all movement. She had also lost her speech and thus there was nothing left of her. It was sad to see this fast downhill route that she was taking. There was only so much we could all do about it. After a two week struggle we lost her on June 12th 1997.
Death as we all know is inevitable. But to lose a loved one while still young is devastating. What to me coupled the tragedy was the insensitive medical treatment that she underwent. Had I then known of organizations that helped to cope with the dreaded cancer, I would have made sure that she received some kind of solace from them. This disease is one were the rate of mortality is high; however it could have been brought about in a dignified manner. It is twelve years since she has left us and the void created only seems to grow. What triggered this thought process was an unexpected visit to the Command Hospital during my just concluded trip. The reason for the visit was to look up on my friend’s brother who had met with a road accident and was thus admitted for medical investigations. He is a serving officer and thus belonged to the privileged group. His room was in a cottage like building and this made me think that the amenities too would match the ambience. I was in for a shock when I went in and saw that nothing much had changed. If this is what is provided for a serving officer, I dread to think as to what the conditions of the wards would be. The stray dogs still had a field day.
On looking back, I think the trip to the hospital and the revival of this chapter was definitely inevitable. The reason why I say this is because just before my departure to Bangalore, we had a small get together of my husband’s side of the family. It was not planned but it just happened that both his brother and nephew were with us and thus we reminisced on all the happenings. A lot was spoken about my sister in law who was a good human being, a wonderful wife, a loving and caring mother and a darling sister. I must have gone to Bangalore atleast 15 times during the intervening 12 years, but it had to be only this time when I got to go to the Command Hospital. Did it happen because she was more in my thoughts this time? I conclude by terming this revival as a humble homage to an endearing human being.